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	<title>The Redemption of Todd M. Fay</title>
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	<link>http://www.toddmfay.com</link>
	<description>Boyish good looks, caustic wit, unrefined talent and the joys of mental illness.</description>
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			<item>
		<title>Being Heard: A Blogging Benefit.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/being-heard-a-blogging-benefit/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/being-heard-a-blogging-benefit/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 12:18:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Gratitude]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[being heard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blogging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conversation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[listening]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1251</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of my rewards for blogging is this sense of being heard. Being heard is empowering, freeing, and stabilizing. Even in stating something overtly negative and difficult for others to hear, I feel as though I&#8217;ve landed somewhere. Found my footing. And from there I can plan my next move. A welcome change from the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/being-heard-a-blogging-benefit/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Guilt &amp; Repentance.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/guilt-repentance/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/guilt-repentance/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 11:35:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Sludge Factory" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Alice In Chains (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Catholicism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confessing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fault]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guilt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pride]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[principles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[remorse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[repentance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[right and wrong]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1212</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[They say Catholics have a problem with guilt. I grew up Catholic; I struggle with guilt. Or at least repressed anger. Certainly an issue with expressing gratitude.
I spent many hours these past few weeks catching up on past episodes of LOST. In one episode, Mr. Eko expressed to Michael some people are more concerned with [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/guilt-repentance/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Borderline: Part 1.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/borderline-part-1/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/borderline-part-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Mar 2010 08:53:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[borderline personality disorder (BPD)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[impulsivity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental disorder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relatonships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-destruction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-image]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1235</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I believe I may be borderline. In other words, I believe I may be suffering from borderline personality disorder (BPD). It&#8217;s possible I may not be. I intend on arriving at an educated determination one way or the other.
What is Borderline Personality Disorder?
From MindDisorders.com: &#8220;Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental disorder characterized by disturbed [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/borderline-part-1/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>I Am Mentally Ill.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/i-am-mentally-ill/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/i-am-mentally-ill/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 14 Mar 2010 12:08:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[contradiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dismissiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[negation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pat advice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[platitudes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-evidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[understanding]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I am mentally ill. I don&#8217;t have any doubts about this. I mean, it&#8217;s self-evident. (And it runs in the family.) So why is it I can&#8217;t make this kind of declaration without catching a bunch of shit from other people about it? Is this really a matter of opinion? Is it something that&#8217;s up [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/i-am-mentally-ill/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>A Call With My Hommie.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/a-call-with-my-hommie/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/a-call-with-my-hommie/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 14 Mar 2010 10:58:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[addiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alcoholism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diagnosis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Friends]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hercules]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marijuana]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personality disorder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[roommate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex addiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sobriety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[substance abuse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[twelve-step programs]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1216</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I spoke to a former roommate of mine earlier this evening. We don&#8217;t speak often, and it&#8217;s been a while. He&#8217;s busy, I&#8217;m busy, yada yada yada. Our affinity for one another remains.
We begin our exchange over Facebook chat. Interestingly he asks me if I am still sober. &#8220;Yeah,&#8221; I tell him. I find this [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/a-call-with-my-hommie/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>LOST Souls.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/lost-souls/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/lost-souls/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 28 Feb 2010 08:10:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["LOST" (TV Show)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Charlie ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hugo "Hurley" Reyes ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inferiority complex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jack Shephard ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Locke ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kate Austen ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pride]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sawyer ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-hatred]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1208</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;ve observed character flaws in some of the main characters on LOST:

Kate cannot stop running;
Sawyer has a death wish;
Charlie is an addict (obviously);
Locke&#8217;s has an what seems to be an inferiority complex (pride causing him to overcompensate);
Jack doesn&#8217;t know when to quit;
Hurley believes he&#8217;s bad luck.

Which one of these characters do you identify with?
I identify [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/lost-souls/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>40oz.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/40oz/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/40oz/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:18:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[The City]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Arcturus" (Friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Dre" (Friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Tap The Bottle" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Whitey" (Friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[40oz]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[alcohol]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hustle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Malden Catholic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Young Black Teenagers (Band)]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1150</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I drank 40ozs. Sometimes they were Colt 45 22oz. Sometimes they were OE 64oz., with the handle. But I drank 40oz. Lots of them. Every weekend we&#8217;d get them. I&#8217;d walk the halls of Malden Catholic High School and hustle my classmates for quarters until I collected enough to get myself two bottles for the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/40oz/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;If You Just Apply Yourself&#8230;&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/if-you-just-apply-yourself/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/if-you-just-apply-yourself/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:03:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Just Be" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[application]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[better]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[exasperation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[failure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kristy Hawkshaw (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[laziness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[left-brain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[logic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resentment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resistance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[school]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[St. Rose (School)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[study]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tiësto (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1142</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today I study logic. I sit at the kitchen table, with the intention of achieving some level of physical discomfort. I recently read that discomfort during study helps &#8220;wake up&#8221; the left-brain. Can&#8217;t hurt (though it is uncomfortable). Alternating between overt slouching and supreme posture, I study under the lone overhead light in the kitchen.
I [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/if-you-just-apply-yourself/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Wizards &amp; Warriors.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/wizards-warriors/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/wizards-warriors/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Feb 2010 02:34:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[game industry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Arcturus" (Friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Dre" (Friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Ironsword: Wizards & Warriors II" (Game)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Wizards & Warriors" (Game)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Acclaim Entertainment (Company)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[LTD (Company)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rare]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1137</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Wizards &#38; Warriors, developed by Rare, LTD and published by Acclaim Entertainment in 1987. This game was amazing. I didn&#8217;t think it would be that good upon first glance. The guy&#8217;s helmet looked retarded (yes, fuck your political correctness, I used the word &#8220;retarded&#8221; in its colloquial sense). In fact I didn&#8217;t like it when [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/wizards-warriors/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Giving Up: Day 1,853.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Feb 2010 21:36:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Johnny Got His Gun" (Film)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["One" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[being logical]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[belief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conversation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disillusion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[failure to thrive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hopelessness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[irrational]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Metallica (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[money]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[persistence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[responsibility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sleep]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sociopathy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trapped]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was doing alright, again. Then confronted, again. Then crumbling, again. The same issues. Money. Work. Responsibility. The same feelings. Anger. Disillusionment. Hopelessness. Over and over again. For 20 years. A spotlight on it, the past four years. This year. Next year. It never ends. No one gets through to me. I get through to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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