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	<title>The Redemption of Todd M. Fay &#187; life</title>
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	<link>http://www.toddmfay.com</link>
	<description>Self-destructing in 3... 2... 1...</description>
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		<title>The Story Of How I Got My Name.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/the-story-of-how-i-got-my-name/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/the-story-of-how-i-got-my-name/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 03 Apr 2010 00:28:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[coach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[family]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[name]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1378</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My mother just told me the story of how I got my name. She said there  was once a coach in the city of Chelsea named Todd. She heard the name  and noted she&#8217;d like to use it for her child&#8217;s name.
After she  became pregnant with me, my parents chose the name [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/the-story-of-how-i-got-my-name/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>An Invitation To Join A Meditation Group.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/an-invitation-to-join-a-meditation-group/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/an-invitation-to-join-a-meditation-group/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 02 Apr 2010 21:47:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anticipation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[apprehension]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cambridge Insight Meditation Center (CIMC)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[discomfort]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[group]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[meditation]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1373</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I just received an invite from an acquaintance to join a meditation group. The invitation came in response to a post I published on Facebook earlier, inviting people interested in meditation to check out Cambridge Insight Meditation Center (CIMC). This acquaintance surprised me with her email. I was happy to hear from her, and curious [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/04/an-invitation-to-join-a-meditation-group/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Feeling Dumb.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/feeling-dumb/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/feeling-dumb/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Mar 2010 00:33:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[assessment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disappointment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dumb]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ego]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feelings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grammar]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[humiliation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intellegence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[language]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[maturity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pride]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[subtlety]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1345</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I posted on Facebook earlier that I felt dumb. I quickly corrected myself as I realized  &#8220;dumb&#8221; is not a feeling. Dumb is an adjective used in expressing an assessment of the quality of one&#8217;s intelligence.
From this I gathered I have a feeling or set of feelings associated with &#8220;dumb&#8221; as an assessment of the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/feeling-dumb/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Death, Friendship, Guilt, &amp; Confrontation.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/death-friendship-guilt-confrontation/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/death-friendship-guilt-confrontation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 28 Mar 2010 18:13:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[appreciation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[authenticity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communcation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confrontation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[death]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[friendship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guilt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Omen (friend)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[regret]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[respect]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strength]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[suicide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tragedy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[value]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1338</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I spoke to my friend Omen today. Someone we both know died. We&#8217;re going  to the funeral this week.
During our conversation, Omen talked  about the time his best friend, &#8220;OGB,&#8221; died. He said he didn&#8217;t deal with  it. He said he didn&#8217;t bring himself to be a pallbearer and he should  [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/03/death-friendship-guilt-confrontation/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Giving Up: Day 1,853.</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Feb 2010 21:36:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Mental Illness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Johnny Got His Gun" (Film)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["One" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[being logical]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[belief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conversation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[disillusion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[failure to thrive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hopelessness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[irrational]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Metallica (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[money]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[persistence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[responsibility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sleep]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sociopathy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trapped]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was doing alright, again. Then confronted, again. Then crumbling, again. The same issues. Money. Work. Responsibility. The same feelings. Anger. Disillusionment. Hopelessness. Over and over again. For 20 years. A spotlight on it, the past four years. This year. Next year. It never ends. No one gets through to me. I get through to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/giving-up-day-1853/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;I Came Back Here Because I Was Broken.&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-came-back-here-because-i-was-broken/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-came-back-here-because-i-was-broken/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Feb 2010 03:20:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["I'm Broken" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chelsea]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hugo "Hurley" Reyes ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jack Shephard ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pantera (Band)]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1060</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Tonight&#8217;s episode of LOST. Hurley asks Jack why he came back to the island:
Jack: &#8220;I came back here because I was broken. And I was stupid enough to believe this place could fix me.&#8221;
The Island is Chelsea, MA.
F*ck me.
&#8220;Look at me now. I&#8217;m broken. Inherit my life&#8230; Look at you now. You&#8217;re broken. Inherit your [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-came-back-here-because-i-was-broken/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;Don&#8217;t Tell Me What I Can&#8217;t Do.&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/dont-tell-me-what-i-cant-do/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/dont-tell-me-what-i-cant-do/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Feb 2010 00:55:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Angel's Landing" (Song)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[black and white]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[can't]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Catholicism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[choice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dark]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[defiance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[demons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dignity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[good and evil]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Locke ("LOST")]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Landmark Education]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[light]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[noble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pride]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Salt Tank (Band)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tragedy]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=959</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[After last week&#8217;s episode of &#8220;LOST&#8221; I head up to my bedroom. It smelt like sulfur. How fitting.
Locke&#8217;s signature line &#8220;Don&#8217;t tell me what I can&#8217;t do!&#8221; ripples through me like ice cold razor wire oscillating in the winter wind.
Once, in November 2006, I participated in a weekend workshop where people go &#8211; if you&#8217;ll [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/dont-tell-me-what-i-cant-do/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;Became the Man I Was Hunting&#8230;&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/became-the-man-i-was-hunting/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/became-the-man-i-was-hunting/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 23 Feb 2010 09:24:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[con man]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confidence man]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tragedy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trouble]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1038</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From ABC&#8217;s LOST: &#8220;Confidence Man&#8221; (Season One, Episode Seven @35:50)
Kate confronts Sawyer about his identity, and his drive to have people hate him:
Kate: &#8220;Your name&#8217;s not Sawyer, is it?&#8221;
Sawyer: &#8220;It was his name. He was a confidence man. Romanced my momma to get to the money. Wiped&#8217;em out clean, left a mess behind. So I [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/became-the-man-i-was-hunting/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;You&#8217;re Not Useless.&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/youre-not-useless/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/youre-not-useless/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 23 Feb 2010 07:49:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[addict]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Belial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dysfunctional]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[expendable]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[helpful]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hero]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hopless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[idle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[incompetent]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ineffective]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[inept]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[savior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[true name]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[unproductive]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[unseen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[useless]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[vain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[valuable]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weak]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[working]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worthless]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1028</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From ABC&#8217;s LOST: &#8220;The Moth&#8221; (Season One, Episode Seven @ 34:06)
Charlie, the addict, explains to Jack, the doctor/hero/universal savior, why he didn&#8217;t say anything about his withdrawal from heroine while on the island.
Jack: &#8220;Why didn&#8217;t you say anything? I could have helped you through this.&#8221;
Charlie: &#8220;You thinking I&#8217;m useless and a junkie to boot.&#8221;
Jack: &#8220;Useless? [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/youre-not-useless/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>&#8220;I Just Can&#8217;t Dig In.&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-just-cant-dig-in/</link>
		<comments>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-just-cant-dig-in/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 23 Feb 2010 06:41:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Todd M. Fay</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[LOST]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fear]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[reluctance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[running away]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.toddmfay.com/?p=1025</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From ABC&#8217;s LOST: &#8220;House of the Rising Sun&#8221; (Season One, Episode Six, @ 34:25)
Jack is moving some of survivors into the freshwater caves. There&#8217;s an exchange between Jack and Kate, where Jack indirectly breeches the subject of Kate joining them.
Jack: &#8220;It&#8217;s almost time to go.&#8221;
Kate: &#8220;I dont&#8217; wanna be Eve.&#8221;
Jack: &#8220;No one&#8217;s asking you to.&#8221;
Kate: [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.toddmfay.com/2010/02/i-just-cant-dig-in/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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